Onion News Network: Today Now

Videos in this Playlist

1. 31

   

   Missing Child Likely A Prostitute By Now

   from The Onion

   2:57 | 371 views

   Today Now! utilizes computer technology to show a mother how rampant drug use and prostitution has ravaged her little girl's body.

2. 32

   

   Medical Miracle Man Lives Thanks To Heart Stolen From Dead Man

   from The Onion

   3:06 | 266 views

   Start your day with our morning show, Today Now! Join hosts Jim and Tracy as they welcome Dave Portman, a real-life Frankenstein's monster.

3. 33

   

   Evangeline Lilly Wins 'Best Wet T-Shirt Fight Scene' At Strong Women In

   from The Onion

   2:22 | 52,038 views

   Today Now!'s own Tracy Gill attended the Strong Women in TV Awards, which proves women on TV can be attractive and sexy.

4. 34

   

   The Onion News Network's Morning Show Today Now!

   from The Onion

   0:31 | 409 views

   You'll think you're still dreaming.

5. 35

   

   Fat Kid Successfully Avoids Ridicule By Swimming With Shirt On

   from The Onion

   3:11 | 596 views

   Today Now! brings you the inspiring story of Brian Peete, a fat boy who hid his obesity from other children at the pool by keeping his shirt on.

6. 36

   

   Child Bankrupts Make-A-Wish Foundation With Wish For Unlimited Wishes

   from The Onion

   2:24 | 28,471 views

   Today Now! has the story of an 8-year-old whose demand for never-ending wish fulfillment may force the Make-A-Wish Foundation to shut down.

7. 37

   

   Expert On Anteaters Wasted Entire Life Studying Anteaters

   from The Onion

   3:03 | 323 views

   Today Now! host Jim Haggerty consoles a severely depressed zoologist on the latest Critter Corner installment.

8. 38

   

   FCC Okays Nudity On TV If It's Alyson Hannigan

   from The Onion

   3:36 | 1,175 views

   An FCC official clarifies new broadcasting regulations that clear the way for more nude scenes featuring the beautiful, auburn-haired Alyson Hannigan.

9. 39

   

   Tracy Gill On New Tracy Gill Biography

   from The Onion

   2:24 | 190 views

   Tracy Gill talks with the author of a new book about the morning show diva we all love to hate: Tracy Gill.