Onion News Network:

Videos in this Playlist

1. 21

   

   [video] Is Using A Minotaur To Gore Detainees A Form Of Torture?

   from The Onion

   2:39 | 18,879 views

   In The Know panelists discuss the closing of the controversial detainee labyrinth and debate whether the Minotaur's sternum-stomping-by-hooves interrogation technique yielded valuable intelligence.

2. 22

   

   Ominous Music Heard Throughout U.S. Sends Nation Into Panic

   from The Onion

   2:49 | 20,058 views

   Government officials have not determined the source of the music or what it could portend, but they urge Americans to avoid deserted mansions, woods, and eerily quiet lake cabins.

3. 23

   

   Baseball Superstar Accused of Performance-Enhancing Genie Use

   from The Onion

   2:55 | 7,778 views

   Despite eyebrows raised by his .850 batting average and Persian oil lamp he carries everywhere, 'Magic Lamp' emphatically denies ever using a genie.

4. 24

   

   White House Reveals Obama Is Bipolar, Has Entered Depressive Phase

   from The Onion

   2:30 | 16,351 views

   White House officials admit Obama's extreme confidence and total euphoria over"hope"and"change"were symptoms of a prolonged manic episode.

5. 25

   

   Advocacy Group Decries PETA's Inhumane Treatment Of Women

   from The Onion

   2:19 | 10,866 views

   Women Deserve Better says PETA abuses defenseless, simple-minded women by forcing them to remove their clothes and participate in humiliating publicity stunts.

6. 26

   

   Google Opt Out Feature Lets Users Protect Privacy By Moving To Remote Village

   from The Onion

   2:18 | 10,568 views

   Web users who choose to move to the desolate village are guaranteed an environment free from Google products and natural light from the sun.

7. 27

   

   Ex-Pedophile Shares Tips On How To Make Your Kids Less Attractive

   from The Onion

   2:15 | 2,492 views

   Child safety expert and ex-pedophile Terry Parker drops in on the morning show to share some insider tips from his years spent as a sex offender!

8. 28

   

   [video] U.S. Government Stages Fake Coup To Wipe Out National Debt

   from The Onion

   2:29 | 13,696 views

   Congress says that with no way to actually pay back our debts, faking a coup to eliminate financial obligations is the best plan for the U.S. economy.

9. 29

   

   Congresswoman Says Botched Plastic Surgery Most Important Issue Facing U.S.

   from The Onion

   2:01 | 15,878 views

   Rep. Lynn Merriweather says bill will protect the millions of Americans who just want to appear as young as they feel on the inside, that's all.

10. 30

    

    [video] Evander Holyfield To Box Horse For Heavyweight Title

    from The Onion

    2:35 | 13,843 views

    Boxing officials are hoping the once in a lifetime chance to see Holyfield try to take down thoroughbred Evening Dream will reignite interest in...