The Onion

Videos in this Playlist

1. 1

   

   Taco Bell's New Green Menu Takes No Ingredients From Nature

   from The Onion

   2:22 | 8,618 views

   Taco Bell boasts zero environmental impact with their new menu which will rely solely on synthetic, lab-produced ingredients.

2. 2

   

   Obama To Hold Job Performance Review With Every American Worker

   from The Onion

   2:14 | 3,171 views

   The President says the purpose of the performance reviews is to have a little face time to make sure we're all on the same page going forward.

3. 3

   

   US To Trade Gold Reserves For Cash Through Cash4Gold.com

   from The Onion

   2:32 | 11,585 views

   Treasury officials say the gold has just been in the bottom of some vaults at the US Bullion Depository anyway, and the government needs the money NOW.

4. 4

   

   Gymnast Shawn Johnson Put To Sleep After Breaking Leg

   from The Onion

   2:28 | 11,758 views

   After gym doctors confirmed the injuries were career-ending, Johnson's trainers said there was no reason to keep her alive.

5. 5

   

   Congressman Demands To Know Who Left Fish Sandwich To Rot On House Floor

   from The Onion

   2:46 | 10,097 views

   Rep. McCullough cannot even fathom the amount of contempt you'd have to hold for Congress, the American people to do something so inconsiderate.

6. 6

   

   Obama Drastically Scales Back Goals For America After Visiting Denny's

   from The Onion

   2:46 | 10,209 views

   Obama will abandon complex policies on emissions, clean coal and refocus on achievable goals like applying deodorant daily, learning what to say when you burp.

7. 7

   

   New BabySafe Ball Makes Shaking Your Infant Guilt And Injury Free

   from The Onion

   2:57 | 11,201 views

   Designed with the frustrated, sleep-deprived parent in mind, the BabySafe Ball can withstand shaking, stabbing, and claims you wish it'd never been born.

8. 8

   

   Political Talk Show Host Suddenly Very Interested In Manslaughter Law Loopholes

   from The Onion

   2:25 | 22,913 views

   Host becomes curiously pushy, sweaty in this roundtable discussion about loopholes in manslaughter law in the US.

9. 9

   

   Nation's Girlfriends Unveil New Economic Plan: 'Let's Move In

   from The Onion

   4:16 | 9,508 views

   Girlfriends' spokesperson Kelly Ambrose joins us in the Financial Fallout Shelter to discuss why Boyfriends moving in with them just makes fiscal sense right now.

10. 10

    

    NHL Tries To Woo Fans By Increasing Scoring With Bigger Nets, 3-Point Line

    from The Onion

    1:58 | 23,957 views

    Hockey officials hope to attract fans and create a higher-scoring, fast-paced game with a new aerodynamic puck and artificial turf instead of ice.